mom rant: auditions and letting go


My daughter loves to dance. And act. She's good. I know every mother says that about her kid but I'm a pretty honest mom. When my girls don't excel at something I tell them. Maybe not so hastily but I gently lead them in a another direction.  She recently tried out for the lead acting role for a Christmas recital at her dance school. You could try out for four characters but she wanted ONE part - the LEAD. Well, she didn't get it but was offered a smaller, still important roll. She wouldn't take it- she just wanted the lead. Of course I was enraged because I felt with all my heart that she needed to be a good sport and accept it. I wanted to convince (make) her just take it. I wanted to give her a speech along the lines of "There are no small roles, only small actors".  I wanted to dial up her dance teacher and have her talk her into taking the role - but I didn't. Even though it looked bad on her part to dismiss the role I needed to let her make her own (wrong) decision.

Let's face it. We as parents have been around longer than our kids and we have had an opportunity to learn from our mistakes. Isn't it our job to then pass this knowledge along so our kids can avoid these pitfalls? I'm thinking if it's not going to harm them in an awful way we need to let them make decisions we know they will regret. But that's the key word. Regret. It's so important for kids to feel that emotion and to not make the same mistake twice.

Fast forward to 3 weeks later. She auditioned for another lead role and didn't get it. She again was offered a smaller role and guess what? She took it!

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